If you visit the Florida Keys, chances are, you'll hear the word, "conch". Phonetically speaking, you'll hear konk, and you may wonder just what a conch is. If your first encounter with the word happens to be reading it in print, you may have mispronounced it and tipped off anyone within earshot that you are definitely not local. That is, if your clothing, accent, sunburn, or something else didn't tip them off first. But I digress....
A conch can be referring to one of two things, the gastropod found in the ocean or the people found in the Keys who have lived there for quite some time...the amount of time being debatable. But first, let's talk about conch, the animal.
If conch is on the menu, it's something you should try at least once. Conch are the rather unsightly creatures who live within those giant, beautiful shells that you put up to your ear to listen to the ocean. Queen conch shells are beautiful and the animal inside is delicious. They're easy to catch, too, and once you know what you're looking for, you'll likely see them all over the place if you're in the water. But don't catch them. Don't take their shells, You probably shouldn't even touch them. Touching them is referred to as molesting them and beond being illegal, nobody wants to be defined as a molester of wildlife. The queen conch is protected in the Florida Keys and the penalty for harvesting one will cost you dearly. The conch found on the menus and the shells on the shelves of stores were harvested in the Bahamas where overharvesting hasn't affected them quite so badly as it has here.
Conch are cooked various ways, but if you have trepidation when it comes to eating what amounts to a big, meaty slug, you might want to try fritters first. In a conch fritter, the meat is cut into tiny pieces, mixed with the chef's recipe of other ingredients (often peppers, onions, etc.), added to batter, and deep fried. You can't go wrong with conch this way.
If you're a bit braver, try some fried conch on your salad, in a sandwich, or as a stand alone piece of meat. If the restaurant has any sort of reputation, you'll hear the cook preparing your meal from the kitchen. Conch is super tough and it must be tenderized before you eat a piece larger than the bit in fritters. The cook can often be heard pounding the fillet with a hammer before frying it for you. Conch is slightly sweet, super clean, and surprisingly rich.
One of my favorite ways to eat conch is raw. Cerviche is a fresh salad of ingredients including vegetables, sometimes fruit, and fish, conch, or other seafood. The seafood portion is cut into tiny pieces and it is "cooked" in lime juice and vinegar. It's typically served cold and if you like fish, fresh ingredients, and some zing, you'll love it. The conch in cervice is pretty chewy but the tiny peices make it manageable and if you have never tried it, you are in for a delightful surprise.
As far as the people called Conchs, they are also delightful. And tough. And excedingly rare here in the Keys. Conchs are the people who live in Key West. Often, the term is extended to all of the Florida Keys. There is debate over what makes someone a genuine Conch versus a freshwater Conch. A freshwater Conch is someone who came to the Keys and has lived here and made this place their home for many year. They often look salty and are indistinguishale from a true Conch at first glance. Some say you can call yourself a freshwater Conch after seven years of life on the islands. But what is a true Conch?
To be a Conch, it is often said you must be born in Key West. For the past twenty years since Babies by the Sea closed, virtually no one was born in Key West. They were born in the hospital on Stock Island or on the mainland, but there is no place to give birth (except from home) on the island of Key West any longer. So perhaps, one should say, born while one's parents lived in the Keys.
But many will argue that being born here does not automatically make a person a Conch. It takes more than that. At one point, the determining factor was having multiple generations buried in the Key West cemetery, having lineage from the Bahamas, having graduated from Key West High School, home of the Fighting Conchs, etc. So there is no set criteria for what a Conch is, but for the most part, you know it if you are one and if you're not sure, you're likely not a Conch.
What sets Conchs apart from the rest of the population is that they are a close-knit, family-oriented group of hard-working tenacious people who have managed to last here for a long time. They are not unlike multi-generational groups from any other place, but they are not like anyone else, either. Conchs are some of the most down to earth, solid people you could hope to meet, but if you're an outsider and they seem aloof, consider that they live and work (often multiple jobs) here all day, every day, and while you're having a blast on vacation, they're working here to make your vacation great. Visitors come and go as do most new residents. The turnover rate for apartments and employees is staggering. Everyone wants to live the Keys Life, but reality is harsh. The cost of living is sky high and to live a modest life here, people need to work multiple jobs. Working multiple jobs means little time to enjoy life on the islands causing one to reconsider just why they moved here in the first place.
Can you spot a Conch? You might be able to spot a Conch by visual alone, and you might be oblivious to the details which give away whether or not a person is a toruist, a local, or a true Conch. After all, anyone can dress a certain way, purchase the correct accessories, and occupy the right spot on the island to fool someone into thinking they've got streets named after their grandparents. But something that is far harder to mimic is the accent.
There definitely is a "Conch accent" but to describe it to an untrained ear is useless and sadly, I hear this fantastic linguistic flair less and less every day. The old timers still have strong accents but like all other parts of the country, the regional dialect for Key West is dying out.
If you're interested in all things Conch, I can recommend a few things for you. For starters, if you want to try conch for lunch or dinner, you can't beat The Cracked Conch in Marathon. The place has looked the same forever, stays open during even the worst hurricanes, and is certainly not swanky. This place pours all their resources into the food, and if you're looking for fresh conch, I can't say I have had better anywhere. They offer conch multiple ways but I recommend piccata or parmesan. Conch fingers are pretty great there, too. If you're thinking about cerviche, Turtle Kraals in Key West offers a great dish (they call it conch salad) as do several local fish markets where you can purchase it by weight. It's almost impossible to make conch fritters badly, so try them anywhere as an appetizer.
If you're more interested in the people, the public library actually used to have a dialectical study called, "Conch Speak". Years ago, this was offered on audio cassettes at the Big Pine Key branch. Additionally, you'll find plenty of books on Key West as well as primitive Keys living, some better than others. My favorites are anything written by John Viele (Tales of Yesterday's Florida Keys is a good place to start) or, if you're fortunate enough to find a copy, The Florida Keys Environmental Story. You'll probably have to go to eBay for that one, and they're getting pricey, but it's one of the most informational, entertaining, educational things I have ever come across here on my adventures in the fabulous Florida Keys.
